I Quit Social Media For A Week

Recently I realised that I was very much on the brink of a complete and utter breakdown. I was about to burn out. Everyone close to me says I work too much but I never saw it myself- being an incredibly ambitious type 8 who lives her life by the moon and judges her own successes and failures significantly more harshly than anybody else's I kind of just assume that I should constantly be hustlin'. My girlfriend regularly tells me I don't need to be a "productivity machine" and I'm kinda like lmao okay sure hun. For context- my schedule before this break had something scheduled for every minute of every day except Sunday evening, and Saturday morning where I was allowed to sleep in until 8am. Other than that every morning, lunch break, evening and weekend was filled with hustle. I would fall asleep writing to-do lists, plan every second of every day, ditch social plans to edit videos, and I genuinely haven't spent a day away from social media since I started using it over a decade ago. To nobody's surprise, ya girl couldn't keep this up. I'm a very all or nothing person and so when the moon told to me take a dang break I knew it was time. I developed the perfect plan called "The Month of Calm" where I would, ideally, not go on social media or work on any side hustles for an entire month. 

I'll probably go into this entire Month of Calm plan in another post but before you call me out for cheating by writing this- it was a planned exception. I'm a very creative person (as you'll see in a few paragraph's time) and to rid myself of all creative outlets would be maddening. This blog isn't really a part of my overall ~brand~ considering the last time I updated it was around two and a half years ago. I don't scheme for my blog, or take too much time editing and fixing it. Photos, filming, writing short tweets- everything else has been monetised in one way or another so blogging is my only safe space. And it's strange because (now you can tell this is just a stream of consciousness) I love writing. I love reading blogs but for some reason I've never dedicated any time to this. Anyway. Enough rambling. Here is what I have learned after giving up social media and all of my side hustles for one week (so far).

honestly all i've done this week is take baths

I Think In Tweets

This shouldn't be surprising to anybody who knows me, or is aware of my twitter presence. I tweet(ed) a LOT. I love a good meme. I love a short and snappy comeback. I love posting that #relatable content and pretty photos and random thoughts that somehow connect with other people around the world. This week I've taken to responding to my friends in meme formats, or texting like eight people the exact same thought with the same wording and formatting as if I tweeted it. 

I'm Obsessed With Documenting Everything

You know when you know something but you don't realise it? Realising I'm genuinely, truly obsessed with documenting my life was kind of shocking but at the same time not at all. When I was six I had, like, nine different journals for documenting different parts of my life- a mood tracker, one for what I ate that day, one for what I did that day, one for what I felt that day, and god knows what else I had a notebook for but I know I had enough to carry around in their own special bag. I've kept diaries my whole life, loved taking photos since I got my first camera for my 7th birthday, and since YouTube started I've been uploading endless thoughts, memories and ideas. I let Twitter know what's on my mind, I show Instagram where I've been and who I was with, and I tell YouTube... Way too much. Not having an outlet for all this, not recording content every day or tweeting my thoughts, or sharing photos from abroad has been so strange. In a way it's kind of freeing because, wow, these thoughts, they come, they go, life keeps moving. However, at the same time it's like oh god what if someone felt more accepted by that tweet? What if this thought made someone laugh? What if these selfies I just took would make sOMEONE I'm CRUSHING ON rEPLY to my gOD DAMN TEXT? This mindset probably isn't healthy so maybe by the end of the month I'll feel enlightened and above it all. Probably not. But I can dream.

i don't regret documenting this content tho tbh

I Don't Actually Miss It

This is the WEIRDEST thing to me because I assumed I'd be going crazy without social media? And I guess I miss knowing what's going on with my friends but also I can just text them? It's mostly weird not scrolling mindlessly on public transport or on the toilet, but aside from that your girl is genuinely doing fine. I know. I'm greater than all of you and on a whole other dang level. Thank you for acknowledging that. 

Less Time Is Wasted

Y'all. I am. Embarrassed? Shook? Confused? Annoyed? I didn't think I was spending enough time on social media that it was cutting into my day but honestly I think I've gained back at least one hour a day just from not binge-watching Instagram stories. When I return I'm gonna truly try and not get back into that. 

Creativity Is Going Crazy

I feel like I've said "I was so shocked by this! I can't believe it!" to all of these so maybe I'm just a total idiot but W O W my creativity has been running WILD. I don't know if it's because I removed the constant noise of social media, or I'm finally letting my brain feel an emotion other than stress, but I am full of ideas. I've accidentally started like four businesses in my head and I wish I was joking. I'm not scheming them properly as that isn't permitted this month, so my notes list for the month is going AWF. I feel like I'm looking for places where my creativity can overflow so I'm currently re-designing our entire apartment. When this month is done I'll be like one of those dogs who are being held back on a leash then go heckin WILD when they're allowed to run free. But the 'leash' is just me holding myself back because the moon told me to and 'going heckin' wild is starting several small businesses. 

Less Dwelling On The Negative

This one isn't a shock. The world sucks. People on Twitter suck. I have pretty good coping mechanisms (see: soft block and mute) but not seeing any of the negativity has been amazing. Ignorance truly is bliss. 

I Miss Memes

Not much more to this one. I feel very disconnected not knowing the latest memes. What's happening out there? What's the hot goss, kids? I feel left out.

My Default Is Constant Interaction

Engaging with people who follow me is something I love and definitely don't take for granted. Y'all are great. Not having people to chat to any hour of the day has been a major shift, but it's probably good that I'm being left along with my own thoughts for a bit. It's mostly strange when I want to start listening to new music or find decent podcasts to listen to and I can't just Ask The Audience. The real upside to this is I've put in more effort this week in meeting new people and making friends than I have in the three months since I moved to Sydney. I even did a socialise THREE TIMES this week? Normally I'm too busy or stressed for that so it's been super great taking the time to actually hang out with people I've been meaning to see, or making new friends. 

met an enneagram 3 and immediately invited her over to watch the backstreet boys movie it was a good time

I'm excited to take on week two by creating vision boards, doing more chores and just letting my mind chill out for a hot minute. Idk how to end this. See you whenever I see you.